i've been asking this myself last night. we've reach our 2nd year anniv and i'd admit that there were moments when we just can't understand one another and we get into each other's throat and i know i'm a pain in a butt on most time...
so i was texting w/ my bestfriend nokski last night...i told him i'm sad and i wish to go home. He told me to hang in here and just talk to him (the person above) i told him that i do,i even make peace w/ myself, although i still wonder if i really did.
i'm tired. its like my whole body is bruised, mind you i get bruised easily... i've left my home town to be here, to pursue a dream, a dream that i sometimes wonder if it will ever happen. I admit that i'm lost, i don't know what i really want and i really plan on doing. 2006 is about to end and i ask myself if i've accomplished something this year... am i really happy or i'm just pretending? hayyyy.... its frustrating!
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About Me
- Nynka
- i'm a daughter, a wife, a sister, a friend and a mom. Describing myself aint easy but if you're close to me, you know me best. I love life and i'm thankful that i've been blessed. I'm taking baby steps in reaching my dreams and goals but right now i'm busy being a wife and a mom to the 2 toddlers whom i love more than myself. Married for almost 7 years now to loving and adorable husband.
I wish I can help you with this question but you're the only one who can answer this.
ReplyDeleteI see myself in you when I got married. I had to give up a lot of things and I wasn't used to it. I was career oriented and independent. At first, my priority was more focused on career until I realized that it isn't everything (I was always having spats with B), that family is much more important.
It really depends on what you want in life - your priorities.
if i'm honest with myself, i'd say I'm really lost but i wake up every morning, put up a smile and say HELLO WORLD! eventhough my heart says just to deal w/ what i feel. I don't want to go to the depression mode, i fight it... I don't believe in depression but i'm falling there. My bro-in-laws gf said she admire me for being so easy going, she knows that i'm having a hard time. Indeed i am. But i love nik, i love being married and i just have to deal w/ this but it makes me wonder if through this process, am i losing myself??
ReplyDeletewell, good for you. It's not easy getting married. And I'm sure at your age, it's harder because you still want to achieve something for yourself.
ReplyDeleteSome people say marriage is nakakasakal. I think because you have to give up a lot of stuff to make it work but there are perks too - you know, at the end of the day, there's always someone there who you can talk to, fight with, plan a future with.
Good luck! I'm sure everything will be alright.
that's why i always tell myself that i should be thankful coz i'm still blessed...thanks antz:)
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